Monday, July 28, 2014

Sunday night, sitting outside listening to crickets and the hum of air conditioners. My neighbor saw me holding my feet up to avoid any palmetto cockroaches and crickets, and brought a chair over to me to place my feet on. Total chivalry. Bad guys may get all the press, but gentlemen rule.

I'm outside because it almost feels tropical, and I just needed a respite before the week begins. I had a nice frozen Skinny Girl cosmo, made by yours truly, and wasn't quite ready to go to bed. Some feelings are just meant to be savored, and like the wonderful taste and feel of the cosmo, that's exactly what I'm doing. The night has a vacation vibe to it.

I'm finding myself faced with a hard decision, and that has jolted me from my routine. I'm 75% decided, okay, make that 80%. But, now it's just figuring out how to work everything out so it will have the least of repercussions on those who will be affected.

I still miss Atticus, but the hollow, sometimes unbearable sadness has gone and turned into fond memories. A week or so after he died, I woke one morning and felt him in his spot on my bed, on my right side, curled up just below my chest. The heat, weight, breathing and everything. I moved my hand to pet him, but was met with air. I'm not entirely convinced that he wasn't there with me. 

My birthday is in exactly one week. I aim to make a final decision before that day and whatever that ends up being, set things in motion.

It's time to give up the weekend to the week, and get to bed.

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