Saturday, March 08, 2003

There are some things that we women just don't have to endure, well, because we're women.

One being an incident that happened to a coworker yesterday. He was in the men's restroom, washing his hands when an ample sized customer walked in and cut a huge fart. Without shame, he fired out about three more loud blasts, then turned to my coworker and said, "Well, if you can't do that in the men's room, where can ya?"

My coworker replied completely deadpan, "Hey, it's you're underwear, not mine," then walked out.

I just can't see that happening in the women's room between two women.

This same coworker had a similar incident today. He walked in to the men's room and noticed that the stall was out of toilet paper. He went to the supply room and grabbed a roll, and was on his way back in when a fat guy rushed past him into the stall. Seconds later, he heard let's just say, some rapid fire farts and waste expulsion. Thoroughly disgusted, he walked out, but not before he heard the man jiggling the empty toilet paper dispenser.

He told me to keep an eye out for a customer who might be missing a shirt.

Yesterday wasn't a shining example of my better judgement when I drove to work on a car that was running on fumes. The night before, the last thing that I wanted to do was go to the gas station, so I didn't. I thought I could eek out one more drive to work.

I was almost right.

About half a mile from the store, my car started to gasp, thrust, and cough. "No," I said, as it continued to die. A large pickup behind me was on my ass, and I turned on my hazards. It lurched again, and I had hope that I could make it to the gas station, but then it just died. It was the first time ever that I had run out of gas, and felt like an enlarged idiot. Traffic piled up behind me and the truck pulled around my helpless car. A man in an SUV pulled up beside me and asked me if he needed me to call someone or I needed a ride. I told him, "I'm out of gas, I'm such an idiot." He shrugged and said, "It happens."

I then told him I'd take him up on the ride, and was just about to get out when I said that I'd try it one more time. I turned the ignition, and my little Honda fired right up. I thanked the man and told him that I'd try to make it, and he pulled in behind me to be a buffer from the other traffic in case it quit again. I don't know if it was the sight of the gas station, but after lurching and spitting and teetering on another stall, the car shot into high gear and made it all the way to the pump.

I felt like a complete and utter fool. It was a lesson learned.

Perhaps that's why I've been in a better mood the last couple of days. A stranger who could have kept driving extended help to me. Kind of like a pair of gentle hands that had my back when I almost fell. I think the reminder that we are never alone even when there are no familiar faces around, was exactly what I needed to know on that cold morning.

Perhaps it was meant for me to run out of gas, so I could see just that.

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